Lisa Summe

does cancer szn make u emotional

the last of the cat hair clumped on the hamper’s edge

in certain sunlight bike bells sounding fake happy

in the negative space of the inarguably sad songs you send me

to believe my sadness I need someone

to shove her tongue down the throat of the grief party

in the front yard

rained out

the tissues rained on

& sun dried & rained on again

pre-funeral

the girl upstairs is dead says my crying neighbor

maybe suicide

I watch the forensic unit’s red lights flash until my ears ring

a man pulls a stretcher up the yard

up the stairs

this morning I pulled glass out of my foot

the busted front door

I am doing everything to imagine anything but

someone stomping up there & killing her

I heard nothing all night but the roaring window unit keeping us cool

it isn’t even July

yet we have made a home inside each other

citrus heavy impossibility

your one pair of shorts the only trace of you besides your hair

dark lines on my white sheets

I will take anything I can get

your boyfriend always needing you

me in your kitchen again staring forever

at the photo of the two of you on your fridge

lit up life I don’t know

while I cry on your shoulder

six-month blind spot my own making

I look & I look

call it exposure therapy

call it a kink

in my neck